death sentence

before I face God,

I have a confession.

I was never brave before,

as I had always chosen the safest route possible.

I was never courageous before,

as I lived my life hidden behind a mask.

I was never totally honest before,

I convinced myself that I have shed away the mask,

but all I did was making it less thicker and that's it.

I was never wise before,

as I sowed wisdom into people's mind,

feeling proud that I made changes to people's life,

but rarely take heed of it myself.

I was never truly humble before,

as I consciously parade my blessings,

but acting as if I'm oblivious of them,

and secretly snickered at those who doesn't own them.

I was never the person I made people thought I was.

It used to be hard to live in that facade,
but as time passed by, 

the facade has turned into my second skin.

Now, in this spot, I have been stripped bare.

Everything is transparent.

There's no mask, no hole, no facade, no nothing for me to run and hide anymore.

It is strange. I previously thought this transparency would kill me.

Instead, I feel somewhat--

elated.

But, what difference will this realization make now? It is the end anyway.

Devastating as it is, there's a fact that I couldn't change;

the end of me is the end full of
regrets.